I had the honor to help with a very special birth on November 1 – sweet baby Jesse was born to parents Elizabeth and Doug with the unfathomably generous assistance of a surrogate, Lily. Elizabeth, Doug, and Lily’s husband Sam were all in attendance to help Lily through her labor and greet this gorgeous baby. – Steph Scott
I was so excited about going to this unique birth. Because it was an induction, I knew when it would happen (11/1/11 – nobody will ever forget this little girl’s birthday!). I had a hard time getting to sleep the night before, and an even harder time waiting for the call to head over to the hospital. Lily and I kept in touch by text. Finally I texted Lily that the anticipation was killing me, and she replied that she was ready for me!
I arrived around 10:00 am. The doctor had broken Lily’s water at 8:24 am, and contractions came on pretty strong soon after that. (Elizabeth mentioned that Lily didn’t like the idea of “contractions” and preferred “surges” instead, and I kept forgetting! Sorry, Lily!) Sam was helping Lily labor in the shower when I got there, so I said hello to Elizabeth and Doug. They were both so nice, and very excited to finally get to meet their baby! They said Lily was doing great and they all really liked Sherah, their nurse. I had never met Elizabeth and Doug, although Elizabeth and I had exchanged some emails. It was great to finally meet them both – we hugged hello, and then Lily and Sam came out of the bathroom and it was time to get to work.
Lily looked great and seemed like she had excellent control, but she didn’t feel like it. She was most comfortable staying upright and wanted to try the birth ball. We put the ball on the bed so she could lean over onto it, and I stood behind her massaging her back. Then she sat on the ball and leaned onto the bed while I massaged her back. Lily felt very hot, so Elizabeth fanned her with a magazine and Sam and I brought cold washcloths with lavender and peppermint for her face and neck.
I was struck throughout Lily’s labor by what a great support and positive influence Elizabeth was. She seemed to know just what to say to keep Lily feeling encouraged. She anticipated the needs of everyone in the room, not just Lily but Sam, Doug, and myself too. Little things like reminding Sam to drink water, checking if Doug needed anything, and asking if I needed a break to pump (thank goodness she asked – I did, although I hadn’t realized it!) – all of this helped to keep everyone in the room feeling cared for and important. I was amazed that Elizabeth’s heart was big enough, at the birth of her baby, to show such concern for the whole birth team.

Lily gets a back rub from Elizabeth & a shoulder rub from Sam
Lily labored on the ball for about 20 minutes and then wanted to take another shower. I dug out my lavender soap and my flashlight so she could turn off the bright bathroom light and still be able to see (not as nice as a candle but a flashlight on the counter does lend a certain ambiance!). After another 20 minutes in the shower, Lily wanted to lie down in the bed. Sam and Elizabeth made her comfortable with multiple pillows and bolsters, and I got behind her to apply counterpressure to her sacrum.
Around noon Lily asked Sherah to check her cervix. She was feeling the surges much more intensely now. Also, the baby kept hiccupping – which made Lily and Elizabeth smile despite Lily’s discomfort. When she was changing positions after the cervical check, Lily pulled her heplock out and nurse Sherah (who was wonderful) needed to replace it – she had a hard time getting it to go back in, and Lily was dealing with huge surges all the while. Elizabeth was getting teary seeing her friend in so much pain. Eventually Dr. Schiemenz came in to check on Lily, and she helped get the saline lock back in.
Dr. Schiemenz checked Lily’s cervix at 12:45; she was dilated to 7-8 cm. Lily was nauseous and shaky – great signs that she’d be pushing before too long! I put some peppermint oil on a cool washcloth to help with her nausea. Soon she wanted to get out of bed and back in the shower, so Elizabeth went to get the shower nice and hot while Sam stayed with Lily. Sam helped her into the bathroom, and Elizabeth, Doug, and I waited and chatted while I pumped.
Over at the couch, we could hear Lily in the shower moaning more and more loudly. I asked Doug how he was doing with all this. Other than talking with the social worker and annoying paperwork lady, he had been spending most of his time sitting on the couch with his laptop. He said he was doing great although the moaning was kind of freaking him out; Elizabeth had had epidurals with their two girls, so he wasn’t used to the sounds of natural birth. He was happy to be sitting back at a distance. He joked that at least Sam could rub Lily’s feet: “I know Lily doesn’t want me anywhere near her feet, so I’ll just sit right here.” J
Around 1:00 pm, in the shower, Lily asked if it was too late to get an epidural. Elizabeth went to talk to her about it and once again said just the right things – she assured Lily she could have it if it was what she really wanted, but the baby was really close to being born now and Lily would be thankful later if she stuck to her plan for a natural birth. Sherah came in while Elizabeth was talking, and Sherah said pretty much the same thing – plus Lily was so close now that by the time she could get the epidural she would be almost done, and she might be numb after the baby was born.
When Lily came out of the shower, she got in bed and said she was feeling a lot more pressure. At 1:20 Dr. Schiemenz checked Lily’s cervix again and said she was 9 cm and could push a little if she wanted to. Soon she was complete and pushing in earnest, with Sam holding one leg and me holding the other. Elizabeth changed her shirt for a hospital gown so that she could do immediate skin-to-skin time with the baby. Things got pretty intense right at the end when the baby’s shoulders got stuck – Lily basically screamed her out, with Sam & me holding her legs back as far as possible and Sherah pushing on her belly. This only took a couple of pushes though, and at 1:42 pm, out came a 9 lb, 10 oz, very adorable little girl!
Because of the baby’s color and the presence of meconium, she needed to go straight to the warming table to be evaluated and have her lungs suctioned. Elizabeth and Doug went with their baby and Sam and I stayed with Lily. Lily was relieved and felt like this had been the hardest delivery since her first, whose collarbone broke after he became stuck in the birth canal.
At the warmer, Elizabeth and Doug were helping to suction their baby’s lungs. They were both calm and serene – they were just so happy to see their little girl and knew she was in good hands and would be okay. At her new baby’s side, Elizabeth still never forgot about Lily. She kept updating Lily on the baby’s situation: “She’s doing great, Lily; we’ll bring her over to see you in just a minute.” Doug turned into a new man when he saw his baby – he was still calm and collected, but his eyes really lit up and he stayed right by her side. Before long she belted out a strong, vigorous cry, which everyone was happy to hear because it meant her lungs were clearing up nicely.
Elizabeth brought her over to meet Lily, and both of them were teary-eyed smiling at this new little person they had brought into the world together. It was such a special, unique moment – I tried to get as many pictures as I could. The sweetest part of the whole birth was when Elizabeth told Lily that while they still hadn’t settled on a first name, they wanted the baby’s middle name to be Lily. Elizabeth and Lily were both in tears, and I realized I was as well.

I got some great pictures of Doug enamored with his new baby girl, snuggling her close and looking absolutely smitten. The grandparents came in and met their new grandbaby, and they took some pictures too. Soon the baby started rooting and snapping at passing fingers – it was time to feed her.
They had a pump in the room, and Elizabeth said she was happy to feed the baby a bottle if Lily wanted to pump, but if she wanted to breastfeed that would be great as well; she was fine with whatever Lily wanted to do. Lily felt like breastfeeding would be way more comfortable – so we got her set up with some pillows and Elizabeth handed her the baby.
Having breastfed three kids already, Lily knew just what to do. The hungry baby did too – she latched on perfectly right away and started munching. Elizabeth stood by tickling her chin and feet to keep her awake when she started to fall asleep. After breastfeeding, Elizabeth sat down and cuddled her new baby, skin to skin, just as she’d wanted.

Cute Baby Jesse with Elizabeth
I really think what made this birth so beautiful was the wonderful dynamic between the two couples. Elizabeth, Doug, Sam, and Lily have become very close throughout the journey that led them to this day. The love between them gave Lily the strength to birth the baby how she had hoped to, and enabled Elizabeth and Doug to participate fully in the birth of their little girl.
Just before I left, I was again struck by Elizabeth’s selflessness as she offered to let me hold her new baby! At 9 pounds, 10 ounces, this was a big baby, but she felt so tiny and delicate in my arms. She was lovely, with lots of thick, blonde hair and luscious long eyelashes, making her look like a little lady. And she has adorably pudgy legs which I’m sure will attract a lot of kisses in the days to come!
Elizabeth, Doug, Lily, and Sam – I cannot thank all of you enough for letting me share in this beautiful birth. What a lucky girl is this baby to be welcomed to the world with four such loving friends to greet her!

Welcome Baby Jesse!